Beyond the Boggled Mind

Ramblings of my boggled mind

Cordell Cherry

on November 5, 2013

Ever had someone in your life who was bad for you? I’m not talking insane stalker who threatened everyone you loved, and killed your cat. I am referring to the variety of bad influences that you find in every day life. The ones who convince you to cut class. The ones who tell you to shoplift because it’s fun.

A more practical example is a person who is simply not healthy for you. They belittle you, they hurt your confidence, they are like a poison to your carefully constructed life. The solution: get rid of them.

But what if it is not so simple? Oh, I have heard that line a million times. And generally, ‘not so simple’ means that you know exactly what to do, you just don’t want to do it.

But what if said person just keeps cropping up? And despite your brains warning signs of ‘Danger! Danger! Keep away!’, you just have this pull, this desire to have them around.

We all have toxic things in our lives. Too much television, too much candy. That ice cream, that chocolate bar. Things we know are bad for us, and yet we indulge in them. Call it guilty pleasure.

I have this theory. I call it ‘my Cordell Cherry’ I hate Cordell cherries. I always have. But everyone always made them look so good and yummy. So every once in awhile, I would try it, thinking, maybe this time I will like it. To this day, I still hate Them nasty things.

Your Cordell Cherry is the person you know who is not good for you, and yet every once in awhile you say, ‘let’s try again, maybe this time it will not be so bad.’ But it is still bad. Maybe this time it is worse.

And I wonder, why do we do that to ourselves? Do we not remember just how bad this person/thing is for us? What is wrong with us? Are we insane?

We are not insane. At least, I don’t think I’m insane. I hope not. I can’t deal with insanity.

So I sit on a bench in the cold night air, with ducks coming up from the pond. And I ask myself, what should I do?

I’m a smart person. I usually know what to do, deep inside. They say to trust your own instincts. So I try.

My instincts are telling me to get in a car and drive far away and never come back.

So I ask again. And this time I hit upon the right answer.

‘Go home’, my inner voice says. Go home. Make dinner. Make a lunch. Do your work. Fold your laundry. Focus. You have a life. You have responsibilities. Why are you sitting here dreaming of being anywhere else, when you have a pretty good life waiting for you at home?

And I know what to do. I have always known what to do. It is that simple.

Throw out my Cordell Cherry. And never look back.

I wrote this a long while back. Things have changed the nasty chocolate cherry is gone from my life fully and I’m very happy now I live in a new place and I’m with the most wonderful let’s say whipped cream and strawberry.

Always
Raychel

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