Beyond the Boggled Mind

Ramblings of my boggled mind

Satan called he wants his weather back!

on September 3, 2011

Its been so hot and truly disgusting weather! I keep trying to get things done and really seems NOTHING is getting done not even close to being prepared to leave by the end of the month. Let alone any earlier like I wanted. It’s not helping getting sick and getting so depressed here in this damn state stuck here no one coming around, nowhere to go, just here at the house. Took the truck in at 5-C’s and really got the bid of 400 bucks and he actually asked me if it’s a sale. FUCK NO! I can just take the stupid stuck to Cali with me for cheaper!

For the past few months the only thing that has been making me want to get up out of bed is the move to get out of here, and one of my best guy friends. he always makes me smile, well normally. but Lately I just worry way too much about everything and everyone. I just want to be happy, I’ve not really been happy since My sister passed away. I’ve tried and I still try, most just don’t understand it. but its one thing or another always seems to break the bottom of my bucket and there it goes, depression is here.

I finally have time alone right now, not even talking to anyone on line or in text. that’s strange to me, cause I’m normally at least talking with “stuffy”. I just need to clear my mind and maybe tomorrow or later I will feel better.

Sitting here watching Reba. bad I’m thinking about how someone is always like “yuck” and gives me shit about watching it. I can’t wait to get out of here, I need the break. I need away from everything I know just to vanish for a while. I wish I could just take off and leave completely alone for a week or so maybe go to Vegas again or someplace else. nothing I can do right now. I’m sure when hubby and I take off to Alabama in a couple weeks maybe the traveling will make me feel better? or just knowing I’m going to Cali right after.

I want to feel better before that I want to feel better NOW! NOW! NOW!  yes I’m being a spoild brat about it but I hate feeling this way!BLAH!

Peace, love & ducttape




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